Are you looking for something? Answers? Understanding?

Not too many years ago, less than four, if you had said the word God to me, I would have cringed. 

As a small child I lived in what adults would term a dream world. I was a day dreamer. I played with fairies in my grandparents back yard. The world of church was a difficult one for me. Although there was wonder and curiosity, many of the stories and lessons did not make sense. I am not talking logically, at least not until my teens, I am speaking about that feeling deep within. As I got older, I became more cynical, and it was suggested I not attend church any longer at around 15. Looking back, I understand the intention of our minister. I was struggling and acting out and no one could really reach me. By the time I was twenty I would hit my darkest times and believed that if there really was a ‘God’ it had abandoned me long ago. 

In my 30’s I began a solitary journey to find my truth, my own spiritual path. I read and explored different teaching and beliefs, and each I would put back down feeling only a partial connection to them. I knew things deep within me but had no words to share it. Now I understand what a marvelous gift I was being given. 

I didn’t understand the idea of God-fearing. There was a strong knowing that both extremes, all and nothing, were driven by ego. Why would we come to experience our Self as Creation just to judge and criticize? Today I feel closer to being able to share in language, although language always has limitations that silence is not bound by. 

So, what is the point? What does it mean to be spiritual?

To seek detachment. This is not to be indifferent but have compassionate care for an instrument of service – this goes for both our body and our mind. To be free of sense cravings and self-will. We don’t need to acquire holiness, we are holy. We just need to remove the egoic habits that hide our wholeness. 

“Spiritual life is active, joyful, intentional, a MIDDLE path between extremes that transfigures every day living.” It is not a running away from life but running toward life with arms wide open. It is freedom.

My greatest hope is to continue this journey of Self exploration, to find the stillness amid chaos. My greatest hope is that you find yours too.

Brightest of Blessings, 

Dawn xo

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